Day 45 Awakening Grace and Miracles - My Personal Journey with A Course In Miracles

Hello, beautiful,

What a beautiful day it is here in the Highlands, I am sat on the front doorstep writing, the sun beating down upon me from a vast clear blue sky, I can see the sea and hear the gentle chatter of our neighbours across the street. I have the coffee pot beside me, and I can hear my son stirring in the house. the seagulls are calling, I am feeling the sea calling me into her depths, to feel her salty goodness wash over me, so a dip may come later!

Those of you who know me well will know I have a deep reverence for the oceans, the cycles rhythms and power of water never fail to impress me.

You will also know that as much as I absolutely love the sea, it’s pretty cold water here in the north of Scotland, and once I hit forty, years ago, I suddenly got pretty wimpy about getting in! Subsequently, it takes me AGES to get in, but once I’m immersed in Her, I never want to get out.

This past week I have been immersed in a Spiritual Mastery Leadership Course, attending live calls, practising daily and exploring metaphysical principles in greater depth, it’s been a joy, a huge commitment in amongst everything else and absolutely the right decision for me at this time.

This morning I was, as per my homework, writing out my Life Purpose Statements in four areas of life.

You may wish to do the same, just to get crystal clear on your own way forward.

The areas to create a positive clear intention around are these: Health and Vitality, Relationships and Love, Money and career, and Creative Expression.

It helps to lay out clearly for ourselves the goals, intentions and steps towards creating this as our lived reality.

In turn, each of these becomes our sankalpa, our perfect gift of choice unto ourselves.

I have also been reflecting upon bygone years, times in my life when I have made big changes, where I have triumphed over adversity when the pain of suffering had become too much and I finally surrendered to my hearts wisdom and deepest calling.

One of those times was when I was yearning for a new start, a beginning in alignment with my souls' yearning, a time when twelve years ago, after much inner debate and tussle with myself I knew I had to end my marriage after seventeen years of being together.

I wanted to release us both before the dissatisfaction ate away at the love, we had for one another.

It was ultimately the right decision for all of us, as individuals, as a couple, as parents and as a family.

We took our time, adjusted, grew in the ways we each needed over a number of months, and then together, in a heart wrenching, love-filled, conscious way shared with our three beautiful children that we were separating, how much we loved each of them, how much we loved one another, and that in fact, it was an act of love to release what had been outgrown as a couple.

It was an immensely powerful afternoon and period in time.

Once we were clear, as a family what the next steps were, we shared the news with our loved ones, our families and friends.

It hasn’t always been an easy path, but it has been the right path.

We are good friends and can lean on one another for support and friendship, there is something beautiful, for me, in having known this fellow human being that I married for so many years.

He knows me, he has seen me grow and evolve over the years, from a young girl through to now, we have known each other for thirty years now. Having met when I was fourteen, we got together two years later moved in with each other, got married when I was nineteen, and had our first child together, a little over a year later when I was a Fine

Art Student.

A whole lifetime has been lived since then, and I am so grateful. Our children have thrived, grown into young adulthood, and we have grown and evolved and found a new groove as friends with one another.

I wrote a poem a little while ago about the night I finally knew it was time to release us (if you follow along on Instagram you may have read it). I’ll share it below.

One dark winters night I laid down my promise. I left it there on the table. Many years in the making, Awakening, the desire to free myself from the bondage of unexpressed soul yearnings. There was nothing left but peace and a heartfelt desire to Embody and Inspire; to lead the way towards expansion and greater love. Love of self Love of the other And love of the children grown from this union. And now, now this marriage dissolving peaceably. The rage had burnt to ashes along with uncertainty, fear and despondency. All that was left was love. The promise slipped easily from my finger that night. The road to that moment had been long and arduous, full of adventure, and first love ideals, awash with possibility and unmet needs. But this moment, this moment of clarity, shone so brightly in the star lit night. I climbed the stairs, softly, one conscious step at a time. Fully awake now. I slipped into his arms for this 3am wake up call. Gently whispering him awake. "I can't do this anymore." And it was done.

This was an act of self-love, and love for all of those I held most dear in my heart. Sometimes, I believe, we must do the most loving thing for ourselves at risk of hurting others, whilst simultaneously being with the Power of Eternal Love, trusting in its flow and guidance to show us the way, to light the path before us, even when it feels dark and frightening; to Surrender to our own hearts’ truth and trust that ultimately this is the course for others’ souls' evolution too.

“Love always leads to love.”

A Course in Miracles

The lesson today from the Course, is this: God is the Mind with which I think.

When I came upon the decision, finally to follow my own hearts' guidance all of those years ago, I, first of all, had to let go of my limited, egoic thinking and surrender to the Universe, I needed to lean in and trust, I needed to be willing to see things through the eyes of God, and trust that the path would appear before me with each step. There was no roadmap, only inspiration, a healthy dose of fear, and trust that life as unfolding exactly as was right for me, my children and my children’s father.

I had to know spiritually that all was well, and we were all going to be just fine!

I also needed to understand that in choosing to love myself and honour my needs that this ultimately was an act of love to those I cared most deeply about.

And so, it has been.

I am curious, are you willing to choose you? Ultimately choosing love over fear, and setting yourself on the course of your own souls' longing?

May this serve you in some way today.

May you take courage, take heart and let your inner souls light guide the way.

May you know that the Universe is right here for you.

As am I.

With my love,

Charlotte xx

If you would like to know how I can support you through personalised mentoring then please do send me an email and we can schedule a call:

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 © 2017 by Charlotte Esme Awakening Grace

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