I am sat in the window in a day dreamy state of being, relaxed yet open and yet subtly I can feel that there is an undercurrent of 'get up and run' occurring simultaneously.
On the one hand, I feel relaxed, calm and spacious, and yet within me my nervous system is also on alert, ready to take action and be on duty.
If you dropped into your body what are you experiencing not he surface? And what are you experiencing beneath that?
My own state today is calling me to rest more, to truly unwind and unkink my nervous system, to smooth it out, to breathe more freely.
The active or rather activated part of me relates to having been re-triggered into an old trauma pattern from a few years ago.
Those of you who have been alongside me for a number of years now will remember that I had 10 months off work due to a traumatic miscarriage, and the end of my then relationship and the subsequent PTSD and physical, emotional and spiritual restoration and healing I embarked upon to get to this place here today.
I find it fascinating that we heal in what seems to be layers of awareness and recovery, it is I find, an ongoing process of rejuvenating the spirit and allowing for time and grace to serve us as we continue coming into right relationship, into acceptance and love, for all that we have experienced, endured and moved forward from.
I believe that these significant, and often painful experiences we go through shape and mould us, without them we would not be who we are today.
I find also, that it takes great courage to continue choosing love, acceptance and creating meaning from our past traumas so that we are not bogged down in negativity or stuck in a state of bewilderment and overwhelm.
These significant events can also be 'positive' experiences, getting married, having a child, moving, starting a new business or course of study.
We are never entirely who we were before we embarked upon change, rather these experiences inform who we are in becoming.
Our task is to do our best not to get caught in the past and keep doing the inner work of healing, transformation and releasing, to create space for ourselves to be birthed anew.
It is important to do our spiritual work, through meditation, breathwork, bodywork, mindset reprogramming and so on, so that we may grow through the confusion,l pain of disruption, and so that we may expand into the newness of our greatest self at this moment.
The more we show up for ourselves, by tuning into the layers of our being and crafting empowering beliefs we have a greater chance of moving forward with ease and grace.
You may find it useful to find a quiet moment to simply sit with the breath each day, journal, write your gratitude list, pray, spend time in nature, dance, or ask your body and innermost being what it needs.
Perhaps some of the answers may look and sound like this …
A daily dance practice to release and surrender to the flow
A consciousness-expanding and energy healing breathwork practice
Shaking practice to ignite your inner power and release stuck energy
To get grounded
A quiet place to rest
To express some encouraging words to yourself
A shoulder to lean on and a hand to hold
Some nourishing calming foods and more water
A creative outlet
Or perhaps even some sleep would be the most valuable to you and your beautiful body at this time.
By taking the time to listen and be present you will hear the deep and subtle answers to these questions.
What do you need beautiful body of mine?
How may I serve you today? What would you like to tell me? What will make you happy and at peace?
What do you and your beautiful body need today?
I shall be shaking, dancing and breathing myself to a state of flow and acceptance. Then I shall set my easel and oil paints up.
When we seek the truth within and throughout our life experiences, when we rest in the arms of the Beloved, with the Divine, then all else may ease its way through us.
In this manner we rest in truth, trusting that all is well and we are held in the arms of Greater Love.
Our lesson today from the Course, lesson 131, is this, 'No one can fail who seeks to reach the truth'.
"When you want only love you will see nothing else."
- A Course In Miracles
May this serve us well today.
With my love,